James and Beth

Went to bible study last night. I was tired and wasn't really feeling it but I went b/c I knew it'd be good. Beth's bible study's are always good and I am enjoying the ladies of Shades Mountain. We are studying James. Wow, was he interesting. Pat, our leader of the study is so good to remind us that James was writing to Jewish people. But James saw the light, literally, the light of Jesus and after being a non believer his whole life he knew that Jesus was truly God. Cannot imagine if one of my sister's was the messiah! Anyway, last nights lesson was all about joy and anguish. Beth used the analogy of childbirth, one most of us could relate to. The anguish and pain and fear and dread of labor almost always gives way to joy. We had to do a little exercise with one person in the room whom we didn't know. Well, thats easy for me b/c I only know two people there so I just chatted with the girl next to me. I say girl b/c she was 24 years old. The same as Lauren. For the first time in my life, I felt like I was really giving a gift of my experiences. The exercise had to do with a time when we felt such anguish that we really couldn't move. Well, Lord knows I've been there. I couldn't move and I was helpless with this situation. All I could do was fall back on my faith and ask God for a sign. Something that would ease my mind and put my mind at peace about Lauren. Was she okay? How would I ever know? On top of it, I had three young children, precious children to raise and I didn't want to compromise their childhood with my anguish, so I asked out loud " Give me something God, something to know that she is okay." So, He did. He gave me that night a dream of angels, angels I couldn't really see but I knew they were there and we were floating from room to room and the wood work was beautiful. I asked if she was okay and the angel said, oh yes she is fine. I said, are you sure? The angel said, oh yes, I am sure. We floated through a big door way, the angel led me to a beautiful door where there was a pair of Jack's new shoes and a pink feather. The door opened and the angel guided me out the door. Clearly, they were saying, now go and be a mommy knowing that your sweet child is fine. Ahh, yes, if you ask, and you truly need an answer you will get it. I knew it was real, I knew she was fine and when she called me 7 years later, I couldn't wait to tell her my dream! My anguish had morphed to joy and everything woks in Gods time. So, I got to tell my knew 24 year old friend my story and how being steadfast in your faith pays off! Whew!! Thank you Beth Moore!!

*just a note to say, even though God can bring us peace of mind and take our worry and fears away, doesn't mean that we forget to pray for whatever the anguish was before. I always prayed for Lauren, every single night and still do! I was just able to do it with peace and not saddness. Amen!